Try Me

Try Me

When purging 20+ years of items in ones house, you find yourself overwhelmed.  Above and beyond the emotional baggage that weighs you down, you’re exhausted by the actual work that is involved. Anxiety attacks occur several times a day, especially when you’re on a deadline.  Stress sets in and you find that in spite of the overwhelming feeling of not being able to make the deadline, you’re focused and determined.

Showers go out the window. Hair lives in a ponytail or bun while white flakes and grease begin to alter its color. Clothing consists of your daughters High School Musical sweatpants and tee shirt… day in and day out…

Moreover, while you begin to find comfort in your newly created fragrance, somewhere in the back of your mind you’re certain that this qualifies as, well, gross but you’re okay with that.

Thus, when you’re off to visit friends, not willing to interrupt your schedule anymore than it already has to be, you realize that your friends might not welcome “gross”; no matter how close in your inner bubble you think they may be. So…

You stop at a Walgreen’s to look for your favorite bottle of Calgon Body Spray to mist yourself off because you also have given up your deodorant in the process only to discover Walgreen’s doesn’t carry Calgon. However, they do carry a large selection of imitation perfumes… rows and rows of little glass bottles wearing stickers that say, “Try Me!” As you begin sniffing each top to find one you like because hey, the try me will save you money, you are suddenly aware that a two-legged shadow following you around is now in your face misting you with each glass bottle of “Try Me’s!”

You now find yourself in your car with the overwhelming sense that you’re stuck in an elevator, riding up and down with no escape while a little old lady wearing a dress, hat, gloves, and pearls with stockings at her ankles is standing next to you sucking the fresh air right out of you. And you realize that while you were trying to spare your friends the fragrance of day old body odor, they would’ve survived.

You then suffer through your social gathering with a headache because let’s face it, the headache has nothing on what you’re doing to your friends and Pepe Le Peu would smell better than you.

Not that I would personally know anything about this… Now, to shower or not to shower?

Copyright by ReflectionsByPj 20100809


2 thoughts on “Try Me

  1. Hilarious! For the record, my sense of smell may not be the best, but I didn’t smell anything at all. I did, however, notice the white flakes… Ha! Just kidding. Didn’t see that either. You’re still a rock star to me.

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